So I went to visit my dear friend Alice at the very prestigious library which is her empire. She works at a very exclusive girls school which I shall call Eastland.
Here is what they have at Eastland:
-brilliant students who are pleasant, well spoken and destined to rule the world
-a library that makes me want to cry just looking at it because every high schooler should have such tremendous resources at their disposal (and that includes Alice)
-devoted creative faculty (along with a couple of humor impaired Ichobod Crane looking Yankee snobs with names like Paisley and Scrod who if I were a better person I would not even mention)
-lunches that were cooked in heaven and sent down to earth on angel wings
Here is what they do NOT have at Eastland:
-frosted hair
-excess body mass
I saw one other large woman and I felt like giving her a big hug. Of course she was far better dressed than me and had that clanky Indian jewelry that we fat girls sometimes use to distract people from the fact that we never pass up a chocodile.
So when I sashayed into the four star restaurant that passes for a cafeteria with Alice (who was in "wasp drag" to celebrate my visit) I felt much like the aforementioned Combat zone hooker.
So to get over my feelings of library envy (and speaking of envy I should mention here that Alice has the cutest house, best book collection, and best DVD collection - in addition to being famous, highbrow and having a killer rack!) I have posted the FUNNIEST BOOK RELATED SITE EVER!!!y
Well, maybe not ever, but it is pretty damn funny.
8 comments:
A Maudler comments! I know this is a riff off of chocodile, and not much related to fine libraries vs. not-so-fine libraries, but I think you'll enjoy this link: http://www.chocolatedeities.com/deities.php
Best to you! Beth in Denver
Your new design is purty! It seems to suit the mature, refined nature of a high-school librarian. *I've* never been to Alice's library -- was Rory Gilmore there?
Your new design is purty! It seems to suit the mature, refined nature of a high-school librarian. *I've* never been to Alice's library -- was Rory Gilmore there?
Argh. It kept saying "page cannot be displayed" when I submitted my comment, so of course I did it 3 times and you can see the results...
Ah, the New England oh so proper boarding school for children of breeding and money. No such animal here in Texas - we got the excess body mass and the bizarre hair and the low slung jeans, complete with underwear peeking out - and I'm at an elementary school!
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